Socal Mom

A Votre Sante

Nearly a year ago, one of my oldest friends experienced a severe health crisis, which I blogged about here.

Because of her penchant for privacy, I never wrote a follow up post about her...until now.

Seeing my friend unconscious and hooked up to tubes and monitors was shocking. Hearing the prognosis for her recovery was frightening. Her situation scared me right into signing up for a weight loss program. I lost 56 pounds in seven months and today, I eat a lot better, work out regularly and feel pretty good.

And I'm happy to say, my friend is feeling good, too.

She came out of that crisis and embarked upon a regimen of painful and difficult therapy. She remained in the hospital for several months. I visited her a few times, ran some errands, and chatted. At the time, she was using a walker to get around.

And then school started, along with my daughter's gymnastics schedule. I'm ashamed to say, I did not keep in touch. It was difficult; during her first few weeks in the hospital, I learned that using the telephone didn't work; I could not reach her and my messages did not get to her, either. The only way to do it was to show up at the hospital and hope she wasn't in therapy or having a meal, and this became very hard to do when summer was over.

Did I feel guilty? Uh, yeah. But this post isn't about that.

A couple of months ago, my friend emailed me to let me know she had been living back in her home and making enormous progress in her therapy. We made a date for coffee.

I did not know what to expect when I arrived at her condo. I was definitely not prepared to see her walk confidently out her door without a walker or a cane. This is a woman who suffered a stroke and then had the misfortune of contracting a nasty infection while in the hospital. She has been to the brink and back...

...and she walks. She talks. Her brain has been rewired and is back to normal (or pretty much normal - after all, like me, she is turning 52 in a couple of weeks and we are both prone to some short term memory lapses. But hers are about the same as mine).

I was very near tears several times that afternoon. My friend is the poster woman for the power of a positive attitude. She has NEVER wavered, NEVER lost faith, has always been confident of a wonderful future. And her life had been good.

On that day, she talked about her illness and subsequent stroke and other problems as an "incredible opportunity to learn how to live again." And she truly BELIEVES this.

She said she had no idea that her situation had been so dire; this is something that she realized over time. She also did not know that I seen her during this period. I did not tell her that I was certain we had lost her. 

Before all of this occurred, she and I and our mutual friend (the one I wrote about in that old post) would get together every few months for dinner at P.F. Chang's in Burbank. We decided it would be great to resume this habit -- and last night, that's what we did. We sat, we laughed, we reminisced about our younger, crazy (and more alcohol tolerant) selves. And we made plans to do it again.

She also informed us that she's giving herself a birthday party, as she'd missed her birthday last year. "Yeah, I was lying unconscious on my kitchen floor," she laughed.

She's been certified to test for a new driver's license and plans to go back to work over the summer.

Life can be good. You just have to see the good in it.

BlogHers Act to Save Womens' Lives

I am continually amazed by the accomplishments of the women of BlogHer. In three short years, they have built an amazing community for women who blog. They have raised consciousness about the omission of female voices from the tech conversation, they have fought for opportunities for their sisters, they have created income (by hiring bloggers to work for them and by creating an advertising network)...

... and they have looked beyond our little insular online world to see what they could do for women globally. BlogHers Act is the organization's "initiative to improve the world by harnessing the power of women online." This year, the women of BlogHer are "blogging to save women's lives by improving maternal health."

That's why BlogHer has teamed with Global Giving on several campaigns that will save women's lives around the world.

These include:

* Mother and Child Clinic in Nepal: $10 - 2 days' operating costs for the Clinic OR a year's worth of care for 5 women and children

* Help Afghan Women Deliver Healthy Babies Safely: $25 - 20 women will have improved quality of life through reproductive healthcare and education

* Ensure Healthcare for 40,000+ Displaced Darfurians: $25 - Trains 2 Traditional Birthing Attendants (includes 3 training sessions and training materials)

* Empower Women to End HIV/AIDS Stigma, South Africa: $50 - 2 women living with HIV/AIDS can receive counseling

* Noon Meal Improves Girls' Learning in Burkina Faso: $15 - Provides a noon meal for 50 students for one day. 

Please help. Click on the widget at the side of this blog to donate to the cause of your choice. Grab the widget yourself to help spread the word. Blog it.

When Lisa Stone, Elisa Camahort and Jory des Jardines announced the first BlogHer conference back in 2005, lots of people thought it was a novelty. It turned out to be a force to be reckoned with. Let's show the world just what a force we really are.

Why You Need to Get Your Babies' Eyes Checked

I got back on Friday night from my wild three-day, all-expenses paid blogger junket in New Jersey, where we were all treated like queens. Then I spent Saturday cleaning the house. What a comedown, no? (Fortunatly, I did have help from the hub and my niece, who showed up to supervise Megan's birthday slumber party festivities.)

You can read my account of "Camp Baby" here. Today, I want to share with you one of the things I learned there. It has nothing to do with baby products or skin care or personal lubricants. You see,one of the things the big, multi-national company wanted the bloggers to know about was a program they fund, which does a lot to keep our infants healthy.

Dr. Scott Jens is an optometrist (you know, a medical doctor who specializes in eyes) who is chairman of InfantSEE, a program devoted to providing free eye exams to babies in their first year of life. Now, if you are like me and your children haven't exhibited any problems in that area, you have probably relied on the quick exam they get at their annual pediatrician visits. After listening to Dr. Jens, I am thankful that my 12-year-old hasn't had any major medical issues. I had NO IDEA that a thorough eye exam was necessary for such young children -- after all, it was not included in our health plan, and don't health plans include EVERYTHING that is NECESSARY for our kids? (Yeah. I am that naive.)

Dr. Jens showed us some videos featuring case studies of children whose lives were saved because their parents were prescient enough to get their eyes examined. In some cases, the babies had conditions that could have led to blindness... in others, they had life-threatening tumors that could only be discovered with the kind of instruments used by doctors trained to examine eyes (most pediatric offices do not have this equipment).

The beautiful thing about the InfantSEE program is that it is offered nationwide, and it is FREE. If you are the parent of an infant between 6 and 12 months old, I urge you to visit here for a listing of optometrists who participate in the program.

In the meantime, I'm making my 12-year-old daughter an appointment for her first REAL eye exam. Because you never know...

Bad News at Christmastime

I received the following email from Jamie Walker, a PR person I've become friendly with:

Hi Donna -

I hope you don't mind but I just sent you an invite to a group I created on behalf of Spark's co-founder, Chris Hempel on Education.com's website and was hoping you could spread the word within your own parent network...

Jamie's boss, Chris Hempel, learned 3 weeks ago that her 3-year old twin girls Addi and Cassi have a rare, devastating illness called NP-C, which is also known as "Childhood Alzheimer's".

To help save the twins from this lethal disease, the twins need you to send this on to everyone you know. They hope to get 1 million well wishes on their website by Xmas and raise enough contributions to get the medical attention they require. The twins also need products donated for silent auctions and /or having time and services donated too.

I really appreciate you doing everything you can to spread the word to your communities about Addi & Cassi. 

Best,

Jamie

The thought of having my precious baby diagnosed with a rare and fatal disease breaks my heart. I cannot imagine how devastated the Hempels must have felt when they were given this bad news at Christmas.

So I did join Jamie's group at Education.com and then moved on to the website the Hempels have set up to raise awareness -- and research money -- to combat this rare condition where cholesterol is building up in their babies' bodies and hurting their brains, livers and spleens.

I don't know the Hempels, but am already impessed by them. If I had received this kind of news at the beginning of December, I would be paralyzed by it for a number of weeks.  I'd probably be crying to God, asking why He chose to do this to us. And I would most likely make a dramatic show of tragedy marring my Christmas.

Instead, this couple has created a website with an amazing array of information about this little-known illness and an ambitious agenda for raising funds to find cures for this and other devastating childhood diseases and conditions.

There's a lot to digest there -- more than I, for one, am able to tackle at this very moment. But the very least thing I could do was to add my thoughts to the Guest Book the Hempels have established for Addi and Cassi. Their goal is to collect a million good wishes from people around the world -- by Christmas -- so when the girls are old enough to read, they can show them how much people care to help them battle this. And to reach that goal, they are asking for folks to spread the word.

It only takes a few minutes and doesn't cost a thing -- and you will help a courageous family remember this Christmas as the one when the world showed its love for two little girls.

MOTHERS Act

  I've been so caught up in the fire coverage over the last few days that I forgot that today was Blog Day for Mothers Act - which is part of the overall BlogHers Act 2007-2008 initiative to improve maternal health.

The issue is PostPartum Depression, and a bill in the Senate that would address the needs of the estimated 800,000 American women per year who suffer from it. Sadly, only 15% of these women ever receive the treatment they need, which can lead to tragic results  (suicide or infanticide in the most extreme cases -- months of debilitating depression in others).

And it's so avoidable -- if only enough new mothers were educated so they could see the warning signs; if only they were routinely screened.

This is a subject that strikes close to home. I have family members who have had to deal with PPD. It's so hard for everyone involved: the new mother and her family and friends, who all feel helpless to deal with the condition. Some people eventually "snap out of it" -- others need the help of counseling and medication.

The Moms Opportunity to Access Help, Education, Research and Support for Postpartum Depression Act, or MOTHERS Act (S. 3529), will ensure that new mothers and their families are educated about postpartum depression, screened for symptoms and provided with essential services.  In addition, it will increase research into the causes, diagnoses and treatments for postpartum depression.  The bill is sponsored by Senators Menendez and Durbin.

PLEASE take a moment today to call your Senators and urge them to support S.3529. A complete list of US Senators and their phone numbers can be found at PostPartum Support International. And if you are a blogger, spread the word. Write a post and tag it Blog Day for the MOTHERS Act, BlogHer, BlogHers Act, postpartum depression, Postpartum Progress, Postpartum Support International. Pick up a nifty BlogHers Act button here, so everyone knows you support this vital bill. While you're there, leave the URL of your post -- then visit event co-sponsor Katherine Stone at PostPartum Progress and leave her the same information.

It may seem like a small thing, but small things gather force in numbers. Together, we can do something positive for women's health in our country.

There But For the Grace of God...

I will not be remembering the summer of '07 as a particularly happy one.

I just returned home from another chapter in my ongoing dental nightmare. The dentist seemed surprised that I did not jump for joy at the news that the procedure he did today MIGHT result in a new root canal anyway. (Fortunately, I'm in the clear on that one -- but I need to undergo the same procedure another three times, so I fear the odds are good that this may happen yet. Oh well. It's only money. And time. And pain.)

My body doesn't want to cooperate with the diet. Every time I switch from their disgusting packaged food to real food, I have a setback. So I'm doing their food today. Again. This would not be a problem if I wasn't responsible for planning meals for the other two people in the family. When I did Weight Watchers and South Beach, I could make a normal dinner and just skip the stuff I couldn't eat. But I have a real problem preparing a meal for other people where I can't touch any of it. On the "protein days" like this one, I've resorted to pizza deliveries and frozen dinners for them, and they've been really understanding... but I've only shared the same food with my husband and daughter once this week and I'm afraid their patience is going to wear thin. Don't know why I have such a problem cooking when I can't eat the food, too. It's silly, no?

On the other hand, I've lost nearly 12 pounds in three weeks. That's pretty good.

On the other other hand, at this rate, we'll be living like this for another six months.

I'm done whining now, because I have not lost sight of the reason why I'm putting myself and my family through this. We all have our health, and as cliche as that is, this year I really understand why none of the other piddly things matter... and why I need to do everything in my power to preserve it.

I have a friend who has spent the entire summer in the hospital with serious ailments that she doesn't deserve. Another friend of mine just had a growth removed and yesterday had the wonderful news that it wasn't cancerous. And one of my daughter's teammates is in the hospital, recovering from surgery for mastoiditis (basically, an ear infection that went unnoticed. No, I don't know how THAT happens but the bottom line isthe poor kid is laid up in the hospital and will probably be there for another week. We're visiting this afternoon, after Megan is done with gym for the day.)

And today, I heard that one of my Family.com colleagues, food blogger Anne (who is a mother of SEVEN!) is dealing with another real problem: Her construction worker husband fell 26 feet off a building and is suffering multiple -- serious -- injuries. Until today, he was in a coma.

I don't know what I would do in such a situation. Believe me, every time my husband has to go down a 100-foot hole (he is a geologist) or inspect some hillside terrain, I catch my breath and pray that nothing bad happens to him. I am thankful that so far, nothing has.

As my friend Michelle writes on the Grasshoppers site: "Anne doesn't seek any help nor is she asking for anyone's pity.  But she is such a wonderful lady and is trying to send her oldest child to college and get four kids ready to go back to school while her husband is in intensive care with extremely serious injuries."

Michelle and her blogging partner have started a PayPal campaign to help Anne out. "Donate $5, $10 or whatever you can.  Money is not going to make things right for the family right now but having a few extra bucks might help pay for some extra sitters, some school supplies or some take-out.  A little extra money could buy some convenience for this family during this tough time."

Make your PayPal donations here to irishones7@juno.com .