Socal Mom by Donna Schwartz Mills

I Cannot Tell a Lie... To a Point

My husband has dozens of silly nicknames for me - some of which have indecipherable meanings: "Wifey," "Looper," and "Baggie."

And then there's "Honest Donna," which he uses as kind of a pejorative - usually when I've blown a job interview or other opportunity by letting someone know exactly how insecure I am about my abilities. 

So this morning, I discovered that my good friend Liz Thompson has challenged me to come clean about myself - to be completely honest and spill ten secrets that I've never confessed before. This is hard, because after six years of pouring my guts out in this space (and often displaying the shallowest, least flattering sides of my personality) -- there isn't much I haven't already revealed.

I like to think of myself as honest... but to be perfectly honest... I tell the truth and nothing but the truth... to a point. I tend to omit the details that might hurt someone's feelings... or put ME in a bad light. Like David Letterman, there are incidents in my past that could be described as "creepy," so I guess it's a good thing I'm not a wealthy talk show host, because why bother blackmailing someone for a collection of supermarket coupons and a Starbucks card?

And let's face it, folks - I may be a talentless hack (and I'm not fishing for reassurances here, I have been called that)... but I'm not stupid. My kid reads this blog. My parents have been known to stop by. Anything I confess here will be available to current clients, prospective employers and PTA moms. So I may be dishing on myself here... but don't expect anything juicy until they publish my posthumous memoir:

1. I bought a lottery ticket this morning. I have no illusions that I will win the $200 million Mega Millions jackpot... but for 24 hours (or longer, if I can resist looking at the draw through the weekend), I can fantasize that I will never have to worry about money again... and since the economy went sour, that fantasy helps me get to sleep at night. And all it cost me was $1.

2. I have owned cats since I had my first long-term apartment in 1982... but until then, I always thought of myself as a dog person. We are now thinking of adding a dog to our family (once our home renovation is done)... but having a heckuva time agreeing on what kind of dog to get (as each family member has a different idea of the perfect canine). The only thing we agree upon is that it won't be a puppy (we will have new carpet and no one has the patience to housebreak a baby)... and it will have to be an animal that has demonstrated it can get along with cats.

3. I think I'm maturing backwards - and unfortunately, not in a Benjamin Button, looking younger way. I was a precocious kid -- more comfortable conversing with adults than other children. They all thought of me as very responsible. But now... When I hear that one of the idols of my youth is having a birthday and that they are 60-something I am shocked at how OLD they are... and then I remember that I'm 53. And I'm still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.

4. My mom immigrated to this country from Cuba. I have dozens of relatives in Miami who speak nothing but Spanish. I took Spanish for three years in high school and one year in college. I am still unable to speak the language. This does not bode well for my daughter, who is taking it now in middle school - although thankfully, she is not yet at the juncture where I cannot help her with her homework. (I am hoping that her studies serve as something of a refresher course for me.)

5. I am the least spiritual person on the planet - yet greatly admire my friends of faith. As a young person, I really did try to open my mind and heart to religion and spiritual beliefs... but my nature is too rooted in the tangible here and now. I am Jewish by default... it's the religion I was raised with and after evaluating other options (and simply not getting them), I decided to stay with what was comfortable. But I enjoy attending the worship services of others. I may not be a believer, but I find the surroundings and the prayers and hymns quite peaceful.

A Muslim friend I once had said she enjoyed visiting other people's churches and synagogues, too. "I need all the prayers I can get," she said. "It doesn't matter where they come from - they all go to the same place." That has really stuck with me.

6. At the same time, I tend to go ballistic when someone tries to convert me. I'm not very nice to the missionaries who knock on my door and ask to leave me religious pamphlets - I point to my mezzuzah and tell them I already have a religion, thank you very much. I was a lot more tolerant when I was younger. Now... I'm getting cranky in my old age. Immature and cranky. Not a great combination.

7. I love roller coasters, although in recent years, I've become wary of trying new ones. This alarms me, because I feel the best way to battle old age is to keep yourself open to new experiences. On our last visit to the Disneyland Resort, I had to force myself to go on the California Screamin' roller coaster... and I was really happy to have enjoyed it. But I'm still afraid of trying out the extreme coasters at Magic Mountain. I guess I need to conquer that fear, too. 

8. I think I have an addictive personality - but I'm also afraid of losing control. I think that's why I never became a habitual drinker... but do battle overeating. It also may explain my latte compulsion.

9. But speaking of drinking... as I've gotten older, I've discovered that I can't drink as much as I used to. My body has also stopped giving me some of the little warning signs that would signal when it's time to stop. This has led to some embarrassing incidents at parties. Invite me at your own risk.

10. I complain about getting tagged for memes all the time, but I secretly enjoy them, for both the exercise and the attention (Awww, Liz... you really do still love me...)

OK. My turn to tag (and oh yeah, LIz - thanks for already getting to some of my favorite people first...).

You guys know the drill. You can take me up on this or not - I won't be insulted.

1. Karoli - Because she started out as a fellow blogging reader and is now one of my best blogging friends. And she's brilliant. And maybe she'd welcome a distraction from health care reform and her own insurance battles.

2. Tammy - Because we've been online friends for ten years (before either of us had a blog).

3. Sher - One of the first people who ever commented on this blog. And because her confessions will be a lot funnier than mine.

4. Kim - My much younger, much prettier, much more successful colleague at LA Moms Blog. Can't hate her because she's so nice.

5. Michelle - Because I miss her. And I can't wait to see what a White Trash Mom would be keeping from us.

6. Glennia - Because wherever she goes, she brings the awesome.

7. Joanne - When we get together, we marvel at all we have in common... so, I'm curious...

Monday Meme: 50 Greatest TV Shows

I found this on Florinda's blog a couple of weeks ago, and then promptly forgot about it (you know, I do not have as many brain cells as I used to).

This originated from a list published in a British magazine called "Empire." The rules of the meme are to:

1. Bold the shows of which you’ve watched every episode,

2. Italicize the shows of which you’ve seen at least one episode,

3. Star * the shows you consider “the best”

4. Post your answers

Since the list is British, there are a number of choices that I'm not familiar with -- but there were still enough to work with. But since I am such a self-avowed couch potato (I used to tell people I majored in Radio-TV-Film so I could write off my love of Mary Tyler Moore reruns as "research") I thought it would be a fun exercise:

Dreams of a Mother

Happy Mother's Day to all my readers (and their mothers)!

I'm excited, because this afternoon we're going to go on our annual Mother's Day visit to L.A.'s Farmer's Market, where we will shop, watch the pretty people, and enjoy French food and wine at Monsieur Marcel's lovely little outdoor cafe. And I get to be a surrogate mom to my beautiful 20-year-old niece, who isn't able to spend the day with my sister up in Sacramento.

For those of you who came here looking for something interesting to read, I'm going to have to direct you over to the MOMocrats, where we are celebrating the day with a special meme: Dreams of a Mother:

Each of the MOMocrats is writing about our own dreams as mothers and we encourage all of you to join us over the next week.  In true MOMocrats style, each MOMocrat will be sharing a political or social issue close to her heart.  We'd love it if you did too, but your own special non-political dreams are important as well.  We want the world to hear them.

I'd like to encourage you to blog about your own dreams for the world and your children and then leave a comment with your link on this post. I can't wait to read what you all have to say!

(And after you visit MOMocrats, you can read my latest post over at 50-Something Moms Blog.)

When Life Gives You Lemons...

Passover was good.

My sister and brother-in-law took care of all the setting up in my niece's apartment. I scheduled my cooking duties so that my mom and I would not have to share the kitchen at the same time (which would have made things difficult in my tiny space). Everybody got along.

And then, yesterday morning, I woke up with one of those sinus-y, congested-y fever-y things I'd managed to avoid all winter.

I felt like crap yesterday and it's worse today.

So I'm probably in the perfect mood for tackling the meme Katja tagged me with last week:

LIFE GAVE ME SOME LEMONS
- IT'S OK, I MADE DELICIOUS LEMONADE - MEME

Rules:
* Copy and paste these rules to your blog post.

* Link back to person who tagged you.

* Write about an incident in your life you first thought was really bad, but ended up being a blessing.

* Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.

* Let each person you tagged know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

(* And if you want some extra good karma - link back to this original Lemonade Meme post too.)

So here goes:

The summer before I graduated college (with a major in Radio-Television-Film), I was accepted for an internship in the research department at KHJ-TV (the same channel 9 station that now goes by the call letters KCAL). I was trained to work with the Nielsen and Arbitron overnight ratings.

In those pre-personal computer, pre-Internet days, I was tasked with showing up at the station at 7:00 a.m. and grabbing the raw numbers as they spewed off a teletype machine, and then extrapolating them into a form that could be used for selling advertising.

Up till then, I'd been putting myself through school by working a late-night shift at our local newspaper. It was nothing exciting - I was the person who ran the printing plates from the composing room in Van Nuys to the printing plant about two miles away... but it was a really cushy job for a student, because it involved hours of just sitting around between plate runs; time I put to good use by studying. (I kept patting myself on the back for finding a job where I could study while I was on the clock!)

But there was NO WAY I could keep that job (which ended each night around 2:00 in the morning) AND be in Hollywood by 7:00 a.m. for my internship. I had to give it up.

My new boss at the TV station felt bad that I'd had to quit to work for him for nothing, so he arranged another part-time job at KHJ's sister radio station.

And here's the part that turns a lemon into lemonade, because my new boss in radio was a recent college grad, a woman my age, who soon became one of my closest friends. About a month later, another new hire came on board and the three of us bonded very closely...

...so closely that 29 years later, we are still friends.

Our lives have diverged in countless ways. We've been through marriages and divorces (well, both of them) and children and job changes. We don't see each other as often as we used to, but when we manage to coordinate our schedules and get together, it's as if it was only yesterday.

These women are a source of strength and inspiration to me, and I love them as sisters.

And if that's not lemonade, I don't know what is.

(OK. I'm crawling back into bed now, so I'm not going to bother tagging anyone. If you read this and want to participate, leave me a comment and your link -- THANK YOU!)

This n That - And the Hussein Meme

By the time this post publishes, I will be running around the house trying to get Megan ready for this weekend's gymnastics meet (she competes at 8:00 a.m. today).

I just wanted to announce that next week, we will be holding TWO meetings of the Mom's Movie Club. On Monday, we will be viewing "The Other Boleyn Girl" at ArcLight Sherman Oaks. The first screening that day is 11:10 a.m., which means we will get out in time to pick the kids up from school. If you are in the area and want to join us, drop me a line and I'll add you to our ticket list.

We are also planning to see "Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day," which opens on Friday (ArcLight schedule not posted yet -- but most of the matinees start around 11:30).

At some point this weekend, I will post a review of Definitely, Maybe over on Socal Stuff.

The OTHER bit of business I want to talk about has to do with the "Just Call Me Hussein" posts over at the MOMocrats. The response to the bigoted efforts of political "commentators" to create something out of Barack Obama's middle name has been overwhelming... so we've decided to turn it into a meme. As founding MOMocrat Stefania says:

If you are reading this and haven't posted, consider yourself tagged. All you have to do is post your "Hussein name" in the title of your blog and share a story about how someone tried to make you feel bad about your name. (See examples below.) Help put childish bullies like Bill Cunningham in his place by declaring yourself a "Hussein!"

Not sure how to begin? Just look at the ones already linked in the MOMocrats post, as well as the ones already on their site. Also, I'm cross-posting mine below the jump: