The third preliminary meet of the compulsory season was held this weekend, and the girls had been looking forward to it with a combination of excitement and dread. That's because it was being hosted at the gym we left in August. This would be our first time back and there was potential for some awkward moments.
However, my daughter and her best friend were excited about seeing the girls they left behind. The six of them had been together since third grade, and they are like sisters. In fact, by virtue of the hours they spent together in gym, they saw more of each other than their real families. The hardest part of moving to another gym was breaking them up, and avoiding that was one of the reasons we stayed put as long as we did.
So the girls were disappointed to learn that they would not be competing in the same session as their old teammates. This was a surprise, because the participation of girls in gymnastics drops dramatically at level 6. Even at large meets, there may be several sessions for levels 4 and 5, but usually just one session for level 6.
We were scheduled into a split session that was made up of both levels 5 and 6. This isn't that common, and usually happens when they need to balance out the numbers so that you don't have too many girls competing in any one session.
However, we soon discovered that our old team was ALSO in a split 5/6 session. Perhaps the gym had good reason to schedule TWO such sessions. But I couldn't help thinking that it was deliberate; that the head coach simply didn't want the girls to compete head-on - or even to see one another.
Megan and I were both fighting a bug last week. By Saturday, I realized I had lost that fight; I felt lousy all weekend. But Megan managed to keep it from becoming a full-blown illness. When she started her warmup, it was obvious she was fired up. It was her homecoming, and she had something to prove.
And yes, there were a few awkward moments between my husband and me and the head coach. But most of the other folks at the gym were happy to see us. They peppered us with questions about the 35-mile drive to the new place and how it was working with our new/old coaches.
The mood was festive. We were told that after our abrupt departure, some other folks moved on, too - including some of the more volatile personalities at the gym. The head coach dearly didn't want to lose any more families, and he made some much-needed changes, as well. The result, one of the other parents told me, is that all the drama is now gone. Training this fall has gone smoothly, and people there are finally HAPPY.
I felt kind of wistful, as if we could have benefited from these changes if I'd only had more patience. My husband was feeling wistful, too. Over the five years at the gym, we'd bonded with the other parents as we put in hours working these meets. It felt funny being there and NOT being part of it. (In fact, the meet director, upon seeing Gareth, said she almost asked him if he was there to work the computers.)
Our new gym does not host meets, which is something I actually like about it. But I have to admit that by not throwing us into the fire together, it is taking longer to get to know the other families there. And like my husband, I miss the camaraderie we had.
I reminded myself of the stress I felt during that last year at the gym. Volunteering for the gym's parent board of directors was a mistake that added to that stress. I went over the history that occurred over our final months there and reminded myself that the positive changes that have occurred since we left were a direct result of our decision to leave. It took something that drastic to make those changes happen.
We made the right decision, our girls are happy, and we need to stay the course for as long as they are happy.
And Megan finished her session the best scores she's had all season:
- Vault: 9.25
- Bars: 9.0
- Beam: 9.375
- Floor: 9.4
- All-Around: 37.025
But she missed seeing her old teammates, so yesterday, the two of us were back at the old gym as spectators. (Fortunately, the second 5/6 split session was at 3:00 p.m., which allowed me to spend the morning nursing my bug in bed.) We sat with the moms we used to sit with, and we cheered on Megan's old team. And they all had awesome scores, too (Luna, who shares the same birthday with Megan got the same score. And Samantha came in with an astronomical all around score of 37.25!)
After the meet, I congratulated the woman who has been coaching the girls on beam and floor; in the eight weeks since we left, I could see enormous improvements in their performance. She told me she was just sorry she hadn't had a chance to work with Megan and Maggie - "They are so talented," she said. "Would you ever consider coming back?" she asked.
Yes. If that's what Megan wanted. Right now, she's happy. And so am I.
And then, the head coach tapped me on the shoulder. "I wrote you a letter, telling you my side of things - but I never mailed it," he said. He proceeded to explain in his inscrutable, Teutonic manner, how he felt about some of the personnel matters that had bothered me during our tenure there. We let each other know there were no hard feelings.
"I'm just going to pray that gas goes to $7 a gallon," he said. "Then you'll have to come back."
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